Osama meets JAHWAY

“Hello Osama, Jahway has been waiting for you”

Have you ever died. My last thought before the lead penetrated my brain as my lady sheilded me from the coming onslaught of combustion perpelled warm greetings of death was ” I would do it again”
Now being dead, and looking absolutely fabulous in these white garnets and impecible beard; I find myself in the heaven I always tried my best to display to those who could comprehend my meaning for exsistance.
St Peter greeted me at the golden gates and his prescence glorified the idea and personification of the holy worshipful place that spawned two religons at war over the same idea for eternity.
But there was another light, i could not describe it as brighter, but it was more pure; absolute purity.
jahway came befroe me in his entireity. a flourecnt contrast of yelow and blue gleaming as a spec of or sand but illuminating as the greatest star in his created galaxy.
” osama, my life was created for this very moment. you stand outside the kingdom of heaven before our lord and you shall not be judged. for if we were to see beyond the sights of heaven at our own judgements then we foresake our very existance, the very reason why our lour has gave us light as life.
you have already been judged by the hand of men who claim they are the rightous fist of god acting in retaliation for trangressions committed by you.
these people are lost, and osama, you have no fear of hell, for i assure you there is not mgreater hell then the one you have just been a testiment of thru your life.
there is no question that the way you went about your perticular message was unorthidox. but we agree you are an absolute rightous man who has save the lives of houndreds of thousands.
what you failed to realise was all those who you have help to survive and all those who have died in your brutal misjudgements of mans ability to use the light of gods love to create grandure upon the thrones of hell are all going to be with us one dat, as i stand before you now, as they always were when first created at inception.
we are sending you back agian, to live it all over again, but we wanted to show youthe promise. and to know that every soul that perished and trully entered into our rightous contious stream of purity has forgiven all and judges none.
we understand hell, we watch it and listen to prayers and your people and all people need to know we are everywhere, and will remain the true light of rightousness that will exstinguish the false flames of what hose people think is justice.
you almost made it this time osama, but my father beleives people of earth need to understand what we are here and who were are here that the enevitible evolution is to be holy, rightous, giveing, and non judgmental.
you have more work to do Osama, go with our ever precent blessing.”

and then the light was absorbed by the ovary into the womb of a new mother virgin and a new life was created.

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Message from Allah praise be to God and only God

Dear Isis,

I have a message from Allah ( praise be to god and only god )

Why have you forsaken God and taken sides with the devil, Satan, إبليس‎ ?

Your acts are not commanded by god but by men and these acts are acts of pure evil that come only from Satan.

ISIS, you are making the great prophet Muhammad ( praise be to God and only God ) into the Antichrist with your ruthless aggression towards those who follow all the prophets, (praise be to God and only God ) representing acts of God ( praise be to God and only God ) who reject the same evils witch you so dispiese within the infidel.

There is but one God and praise be to God.

Isis, you can no longer hide behind the name of God and islam, for you repesent evil as described in the times of apocalypse as forces of Satan, إبليس‎, the devil.

ISIS, you are Satanist who represent the Antichrist. The prophet Muhammad (praise be to God and only God ) and the holy book shall not be desecrated as you currently prescribe without the retribution of the fires of hell from witch إبليس‎, Satan, was cast by the one and only true God, praise be to God only God.

Nothing you do represents Allah, praise be to God and only God, but only everything aginst Allah, praise be to God and only God.

Everything about you represents, Satan, إبليس‎

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The day the infeidel won

one day, perhaps today; a drone manufactured by the infidels spotted a small caravan of two camel’s and 4 men traversing an remote area of a great mountain.   The gleam of weaponry shining from the camels back gave the infidels every reason to fire according to their doctrine, and 2 hellfire missiles shattered the bones in a plum of smoke while those at Bradley pumped fist into their hands.   “yes, hell yes you towel head fucks!”

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A quick reference

The Dalai Lama, the exiled Tibetan Buddhist spiritual leader and Nobel Peace laureate, said Tuesday in Los Angeles that although bin Laden may have deserved compassion and even forgiveness as a human being, it is sometimes necessary to take counter-measures.

“Forgiveness doesn’t mean forget what happened,” he told students at the University of Southern California.

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Osama’s Diary

I have a unique access to Osama’s personal Diary.   being an alcoholic and dope head I have found the findings of his personal thoughts  not unique, nor have I found him anything more then guilty with humility.   Hell we are all guilty of that, pride, arrogance, and worst is the underestimation of what you would consider just mere trash.  My personal belief is not worthy of any acceptance in the stance of reason.  And neither is yours. He was convicted before trial.   The facts as he perceive them, no matter how the contrast to our national social opinion; were never tried.

I have his Diary.   and that witch I can not decipher I am able to contact him with a Ouija.   Its not my point to influence an uncompromisable emotion within you.   It is my responsibility to provided to the world the Absurd causes of 9=11 and to prove you, beyond any reasonable doubt; that bin Laden made an error of judgement.

If he goes to hell .,    Then I am too.

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Bin Laden Diary (sometime late 1998)

Praise be to Ala and may death come to the infidels.  May we triumph through the righteousness of our soul and be admitted through the grace of Ala to Jannah.

I love that shit.    So this fucker Khalid comes by again tonight, with 4 of the dirtiest American whores I ever seen and some of the best Thai bud he could buy.  Ever since that party in ’96 when we had two simultaneous Jenga games collapse this fucker Kahlid keeps talking bout his plan to finally bring down the towers in New York. Ramzi has a personal urge to get in this plan Khalid has made up, mainly due to his name sake on the first attack in ’93.  These fuckers won’t stop talking bout this plan they got, especially after two 40’s and a blunt.

“I tell you Osama, you pussy, bet me a million dollars and I will bring down them towers.”   That is all I ever hear from these two cock suckers.  I got one of these american sluts dragging teeth laughing and I decided the only way to get Kahlid and Ramzi to shut the fuck up about it is to go for it.

“ok you fat ugly fro haired bastard, I’ll take your bet.”  Hell I just want this damn argument to stop, two years is enough!!!  So I write him a check for a million,  ” I don’t give a damn what you do but I give you only five years.  After that you can pay me back in cash or bring me fifty America whores and a ton of this Thai”

He smiles like a fucking child, witch is the way the fat bastard has been acting for two fucking years.  You can’t tell  a child no and I just couldn’t take the pestering anymore, especially when it was killing my buzz and making this American whore drag teeth.

Ramzi says ” I want in, but you get no details Osama. This is Khalid’s plan and   you just sit back,  all praise to Ala we will accomplish this”

” We will make  you a believer Osama, you will see.”  Kahlid says as he sucks down his third 40 and roles another blunt.

“you two fuckers can’t plan a fart, let alone anything like this. I can’t wait for my ton.”, I told him as I put on some Outkast and roll another blunt.  These two fuckers are only capable of catching a buzz, there is nothing to really be worried about. I am already planning an addition for my 50 new American whores!

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Bin Ladens Diary Sept 11th 2001

This is the most messed up 4:20 in my life.   Oh praise Ala and shit.

I fire up a role of home grown, some shit I found from a seed this Hungarian whore had in her purse, some real swag shit.  I am sitting watching Hannah Harped ride the fattest black dick I ever seen when Yelsam comes in and makes me turn it to CNN.  I knew this was some swag shit , and I wasn’t high, but what I saw was a dream.

“Kahlid fucking did it ,that fat fucker” Yelsam said as he  handed me a 40.  I poped the 40 and watched , amazed and stunned.  

” They are going to blame me, God Damn It.  “

” You made the stupid bet Osama, you gave him the go ahead”

“But I didn’t think that fat bastard was capable of it, he is full of fucking shit all the time.  All he does is get drunk, smoke blunts and fuck nasty american whores.  Damn it, I blew all that money on an addition and was looking forward to the Thai!”  

I watched as the second plane hit, and then they hit the pentagon.

“That crazy son of a bitch, I am a fucking dead man now!  He said the towers, there was nothing about hitting the pentagon,  I AM FUCKED!!”

Immediately I grabbed my personal AK and put on my turban and started to pack a roll bag with some peanut butter and Brandie Roderiks cover issue of Playboy. 

Yelsam says “settle down Osama, it will take a long time for them to find out everything.  You know how these Americans are, they have to have all the facts and investigate all the evidence. You have time,   Finish your 40 and hit this blunt, its Hindu Hash mixed with Blueberry.  This shit might win the Cup this year”

I hit the Blunt and choked down a swig off the 40 while holding in the hit, but I got even more parrinoid. 

“This is all fuct up,  Khalid is gonna get us all killed over this; and things are going so good.   That fat perverted drunk bastard.  I must go into the caves and hide.   Damn him”

” You underestimated him Osama, but you will have your trial and the truth will come out.  It was a drunk mistake.  He hounded you for years and you finally gave in.  Its not your fault.”

“Tell that to George Wayne.   He isn’t Blowjob Bubba, he will send troops, not missiles.  I can Hide and cover from the missiles but troops will find me, I am fucked!  Nawja must come with, we will meet you in Tora Bora”


That was my conversation with Yelsam.   It is nice in the mountains at night, but I must say, this was one of the craziest 4:20’s in my life!

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